Make Doubt Disappear: My #1 Tool to Boost Confidence Immediately
Discover the secret that makes you remember how amazing you are
Today, I’m sharing an awesome tool I use whenever I feel like I can’t do anything right or need a confidence boost before going to a networking event.
Our brains are designed to remember bad experiences because, thousands of years ago, we needed to know where we had already encountered danger.
These days, there aren’t many life threats left, and it is still working hard to remind you of the bad experiences:
the one time something embarrassing happened to us in public
the one time we said something stupid
the beginnings of learning something new, and we were really bad at it
Overthinking leads to self-doubt, which leads to low confidence
Introverts love to overthink. We can spend hours thinking about every move, word, and emotion from an event. Which can lead to self-doubt.
I used to judge every movement I did and every word I said, which usually resulted in negativity.
This led to low confidence and me being quiet and very risk-averse. I couldn’t decide on simple things like what to wear or what phone to buy. I questioned everything.
I researched endlessly.
I questioned every option.
I questioned my judgment.
I created pros and cons lists for every small decision.
I questioned every word I wanted to say.
I wasted a lot of time because I doubted myself. The negative experiences from my past showed up regularly and reminded me of what I did wrong.
A lot of introverts feel this way because we grew up with getting judged for our quietness. This led to self-doubt.
We don’t trust our own judgment because we have been disappointed many times. We can’t make any simple decisions. We are overwhelmed by our doubts and all the options we have these days.
It paralyzes us.
And all of that starts with our brain remembering negative experiences better than positive ones.
Let’s counteract this negative tendency by creating your own “Badass List”.
The tool to counteract your negative thinking
(The name is from the book “Be Seen” by Jen Gottlieb.)
The “Badass List” is not a new tool. It has its different variations and names. I like this name because it sounds confident and like you can do anything.
I have a note on my phone listing all the experiences, situations, accomplishments, and struggles from the past when I was a badass and did something great.
Small and big things.
A list I’m proud of.
Some examples:
Graduating from college
I decided to go against society’s path and chose my happiness by starting again in a new profession
I did a semester abroad alone
I presented confidently and freely in front of the head of the university
I was confidently negotiating my salary in an interview
Published my first post online, which wasn’t perfect
Whenever you need a motivation boost or more confidence, take this list and read it. We tend to forget the good things that have already happened to us and the amazing things we have accomplished or overcome.
And the best part: whenever you do something badass, you write it on this list and will never forget it.
You have already done so many amazing things. Let’s remind ourselves again!
A bonus tip:
Create this list also for your work. Document every accomplishment and problem you solved. This will help you have arguments and confidence at the end of the year for a raise or promotion.
Your Power Action Step
Open your preferred notes app now and write down all the amazing experiences and situations when you were a badass.
Go through every year of your life since you can remember and write down every small accomplishment and every struggle you overcame.
Every problem you solved confidently.
And save it, and don’t forget to read it through from time to time, especially when you need a confidence boost.
Add on to this list regularly so you don’t forget those positive experiences anymore.
If you can find at least 1 accomplishment to write down, you’re a badass.
Keep going!
The Badass List is one tool I use in my mentoring
to help you gain more confidence as an introvert.
If you feel overwhelmed and don’t know where to start and how to end, then I can help you in a 1:1 mentoring session, releasing the knot in your brain, or just letting you vent, and then finding a solution.
For the Quietly Curious
I’ve been overwhelmed by all the networking and socializing opportunities, and didn’t have enough time to focus on being creative. I made it my mission now to create it daily and post it as a story on IG.
We started watching Squid Game season 2 (I know we’re way behind), but after a few episodes, I quit because it doesn’t relax me or make me feel good. And that’s what I expect from watching TV for a limited time. How are you handling these situations?
I just listened to the podcast of Brendon Burchard, and he said something that made me think: instead of having external goals like “making … million € per year,” let’s make them intrinsic. What kind of person do you want to be when you achieve those external goals? It’s hard to grasp because we think we stay the same.
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Wish you all the best,
Karina
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